Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Quientry 01

Quientry – Quickie Entry

A fast, short post for my blog with “less” (hopefully) words than the usual; mostly random thoughts.


• I dreamt the other day of a Harry Potter world (again) Dumbledore, from the 1st movie was talking to me asking me to do something and go inside the castle.


• The other day, we were somewhere unfamiliar in Manila with my family and my mom was lined up for something. I asked her what the line is for and asked if it was for her PASSPORT. She said it’s not and when I looked it was. She was so shy of her getting caught lying while I was crying my heart out and turned to my sister and told her crying and screaming at the top of my lungs “Nagisisnungaling si mommy?! (“Mom was lying!”).” Next thing I know was I was with my sister with our things packed in lug gages in a tricycle and we went off. WEIRD

• DA WHO! I asked this guy, “Di mo ba ako namimiss?” he didn’t reply, and was evading me. I bade goodbye and was zombie mode going to the office, hurt by what happened. A couple of hours later I read a text from him, “Of course I missed you.” WAHHHHH!! KILIG!

• I “promised” to write more in my journal and during my lunch, I went to write a couple of entries, and when I was about to start writing something on Jan 1, 2012, I backtracked and started writing on the space of December 26, 2011. Damn, I have to write all the other things that’s happening and I have to do it fast before my short term memory loss strikes again!

• I said to my tweeter friends that I might soon take shots of me topless so that I’ll be able to see the work I’ve done last December where I worked out 3times a week. However, due to lack of funds this week, my wasn’t in good shape so I have to postpone it again.

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Fluid

I told myself I’ll be blogging more and since it was quite busy during the past few days of the new year in the office, I’ll start with this.

I don’t know if everyone of you got a hold of the news when I posted in my social netowriking sites that I’m officially single. (Gasp! Large huge widened eyes, some will cover their mouth, some will go omgee, I get it.) yep, Husband decided to call it quits, and next will be the question why. It’s a little more complicated that that and I don’t want to complicate things here but you know what; the good thing is we’re both fine. We’re still living together, we’re still texting, I’m still texting his mom and his mom still keeps on texting me and I still got my Christmas gift from her too! A quick history on what happened though, after we celebrated our 3 day celebration for our 3 year anniversary last December 16-18, he then talked to me Monday after we ate dinner at Mang Inasal. That’s what I love about him, honest frank no beating around the bush. I actually thought he was joking and I told him if it wasn’t a joke that no I won’t agree to it. Thursday came and he went with me to my cousin’s wedding as I also invited his mom (practicing photography)to go with us. On the bus, I missed the times I keep on making him laugh with my funny antics; I still have the power to so I’m still good, I can’t stop not holding his hands but he keeps on shoving it away; of course, he can’t resist my pa-cute effect so he gave in. Everyone thought things were normal. Then weekend came and I was still asking HIM for a sign and he did gave me one; HE somewhat talked to me so I decided to give husband’s freedom.

"Yawn-eeeng"

oh yeah!! I can still make you smile!!!

Jeff's beautiful mom and his beautiful A/X bag. lol
A week ago before New year, he still don’t know what to give tita(his mom) and lolo for their gifts and we were texting, and it felt fine. No feelings of anger or anything, I asked him, we’re good right? Yep we’re good. He answered back. That’s what I was thinking and thanking God for; being fluid about things. A friend of mine told me once, “I hope people would live and think fluidly; no judgments, no assumptions, and no condemnation.” I would agree wit what he said if I knew what he was talking about, and then he added “I have lesbian friends that eventually got married to guys and married men who eventually turned out to be gay and the people around them accepted with who they are.” I remembered a famous lesbian in UPLB who got married to a guy and I was surprised to see her with a baby already. People know that we know each other and that time they asked me, wasn’t she a lesbian? I didn’t have an answer that time. Now I understand about people just being fluid about these things.

People were all saddened with what happened to us and I can’t blame them; we can’t throw away 3 years of love; but just like energy Love is just there, either transferred or changed. We still love each other, we just chose not THAT way, when people break up and still stays as friends; that’s love changing, if they fell in love with another one after that’s love being transferred, if they hate each other still the same; because when you get mad or angry at someone; that means you still have love for them; because you still care, because you still feel angry, you still feel emotions. I'll leave you something that was left to us by our Reverend Ken Martin from MCC Main that keeps us humbled; Romans 13:8 tells us "...for whoever loved others has already fulfilled the law."

I assured everyone that right now, husband and I aren’t husband-housebands anymore but both of us were honest enough to admit that we love each other; though not just the same way as before. Just a brand new way and we’re both happy with that. Fluid. I talked to him last Monday and asked if we’re still gonna push through with the Amazing Race Philippines; he said yes.


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