How we buried our mother

It was March 21, Wednesday when I woke up to hundreds of text, missed calls, and FB msgs about mom. I sleep early if it's workweek so when they all tried to contact me, I was dead asleep. My mom was brought to ICU. She had a mild stroke.

I was not really panicking since I don't know these medical terms and stuff they were discussing so I was just updating everyone about me just waking up and all, messages, SMS still keep on pouring in. I have no choice but to come to work since of course, everyone else was on the morning shift and I didn't get permission from them first.

I was not really panicking since I don't know these medical terms and stuff they were discussing with me so I was working, but still praying that she'll be fine. My mind was a bit at lost though as they said mom is under observation. I thought, "Okay, she's being observed, nothing to be worried about." I also thought that for someone that's very healthy and don't have any "sickness," everything should be fine.

Morning came and I asked permission, they did give me permission to go home. The last message I received was that mum was under observation for 3 days. Okay, I thought she will be better in 3 days so I packed my clothes for 3 days over the weekend, and the majority of my clean clothes that time were RED. My cousin booked me the last flight to Manila Thursday evening (March 22) and arrived already in Manila, of course, due to delays, March 23 morning. I rushed to Los Baños, Laguna and straight to LBDH (Los Baños Doctor's Hospital) ICU. It was around 9am when I arrived and good thing it was the time where I can visit mom at the ICU.

I still wasn't panicking since I don't know what's going on and what's happening. It was like in the movies, tv series I watched; the ICU machines, the tubes and all.

I talked to her like in the movies, tv series I watched; I held her hand, stared at her and told her to wake up because I'm there already. I told her to wake up because I look stupid talking to her and she's not replying. I told her to wake up because I'm home and I need to taste her home-cooked sinigang because the one in Cebu doesn't taste sour and as delicious as her cooking.  I told her to wake up because there are still lots of things need to be cleaned at home. I told her to wake up because I need to go back to Cebu already and I'm just waiting for her to wake up.

"Mommy (as we fondly call her), gising ka na (wake up already). Andito na ako (I'm here already), pagluluto mo pa ako ng sinigang (You'll still have to cook sinigang for me!)!"

"Mommy, ang dami mo pang lilinisin sa bahay, at kailangan ko na bumalik sa Cebu, hinihintay ko lang na gumising ka, kaya gumising ka na."

I went out and my brother came and together with everyone else, it was timing the doctor gave us an update; my mom's BP is 60/40 and the blood isn't getting pumped that strong enough to make her feel better. Her body is not taking the medicines anymore and they've already given the maximum dose and can't give higher one because there might be complications. I haven't had proper sleep that time so I'm just taking it as it is, however, everyone else were already crying and I'm just like "duh."

We went outside and ate lunch, waited for my niece and nephew and some other relatives, and family friends. In the afternoon, around 6, her heartbeat went down and she went flatline. The doctor was asking us if we wanted to revive her. Everyone agreed and she was revived. They have to cover the tv monitor on the ICU because the doctor said we wouldn't want to see how they do it; they literally look like they are beating my mom.

She was revived. They asked us to sign a waiver and we already have a feeling on what will happen. Around 7:30 pm since everyone were exhausted, tired and weary, we went out to eat and it was rather ironic and peculiar that all other tables were family celebrations because it was graduation, however, for us, our faces were literally like someone died. We all sat down and ordered, and just a few minutes passed, they called my brother over the phone and asked to come over. My sister, sister-in-law and father went with him while me, my niece and nephew were left. My cousin came and delivered the bad news; at 8:05 pm, my mom passed away. I told and forced the two to eat, and just asked for the food to be taken out instead.

We went back to the ICU after and they were already preparing mom's body. My niece and nephew can't stop crying, while I went inside and they allowed me to talk to her one last time. I told her to say hi to my grandmother and aunt who passed away. I told her that when I go back to Cebu, to visit me in my dreams. I was still joking that her hands was still so cold and told her to look after dad, my sister, my niece and nephew and that I will stay for a little bit longer for her. I told my final good bye, good night and may she rest in peace.


March 20, Tuesday
I was told that morning, mom was taking her daily vitamins and problem is, she always takes/drinks several tablets, capsules all at the same time. One of our neighbor, who is also our family friend (Ate Jen) then saw her, calling her, waving her hands frantically saying that she can't breathe. She was alone as my sister went to work, my father was then at Bulacan, taking care of his brother's burial (my uncle) as he recently passed away as well. My niece and nephew were at school at that time. She went to hail a tricycle (our primary mode of transportation at our town) and went to the nearest hospital. Just a minute or two away from the hospital, my mom lost consciousness. She was brought at first at HealthServ Los Baños Medical Center, however, the two ICU's were already occupied. She was then revived at that time already and was transferred to LBDH. Meanwhile, my cousin went back to our home and closed the gate and our doors and tried to contact my sister. My sister was contacted and he was the one who called my father telling him that mom was hospitalized. The doctor said that mom was already in comatose, however, they think that she chocked as there were still some medicines left at the table when they got home.


March 24, Saturday
It was really weird where my mom was not at home; it is now up to us, everyone of us to move around the house, where it was previously her doing everything. One realization was they were trying to find rags and everyone was just looking at each other trying to find someone who knows where they are. It was rather lucky that I grew up going to the market with my mom so I know where to buy stuff - coffee, candies, eggs, paper cups and all. Everyone were able to cry all their tears last Friday that we were all joking already - asking mom to wake up and help around the house, asking my niece and nephew to call mom since she haven't eaten anything yet for days, and telling them that I need new clothes because the clothes I have are all RED.

March 28, Wednesday
since Tuesday night, my best friends-Sheenah and RV, high school classmates and friends stayed until mid-morning to show respect for mom; it was the last day and she will be buried then. Around 7 am, we all prepared and they went earlier since my bestfriend RV still has work that day and needs to go back to  Manila.  We all wore a white polo shirt with same design bought from a local boutique. It was brought to the church, and my dad, my brother (eldest) and my niece gave their speeches. We then went to the local cemetery where she was buried with my grandmother and great-grandmother.

Last Day with Mom at home!

HighSchool friends visited!

Tourist feels

Favorite Cafe!

and that's how we buried our mother.

Why Join Cebu Content Creators (C3)

Why Join Cebu Content Creators (C3)

An entry.

A child's dream to be a doctor, policeman, scientist, artist, singer, or whatever it may be sometimes is destroyed when it's not aligned with their parent's dream for them.

Some are lucky enough that their dream is aligned with their parent's dream for them too and support them through and through.

Some aren't and pursue things that they don't love and do the things they love on the side. 

Just like Ricky Lee's Trip To Quiapo, I will never forget the line that he said; create your own path. I haunted me throughout my college years and I was unlucky and lucky at the same time that I may not be with the school I wanted to be, but I was indeed successful with the school I was with that time. 

Fast forward, the year 2018, Almost 22 years after my college years, I've been through a lot and continuing my journey to learning.  I never had anything that I can say I'm very good at because the moment I think I was good at something, I'll suddenly learn that I  still have a lot to learn. 

Blogging back then was my pastime since I love writing in paper journals. During my internship with Men's Health Philippines magazine, I had a blast and wanted to share it with my friends and so I started an online journal and turned to blogging. 

I joined a community of bloggers (successful ones like manilagayguy, McVie, redthemod, etc ) when I was still in Manila, but after some time, I disappeared, drowned in work and all.

I now have the time to further improve my craft and not just improve, but really be good and hopefully earn from it. 

A child's dream to be a doctor, policeman, scientist, artist, singer or whatever it may be sometimes is destroyed when it's not aligned with their parent's dream for them; but since I'm now living alone and on my own, I guess I can build it back again and own my dream and really do what I really love.

-vondraye 

Love Confessions A Pre-Valentine's day Show

Love, as a concept will always be beyond comprehension; however, we can delineate it with a few associations of it as an experience. Love Confessions tackles a few issues and blatantly expose the many imagery of love from flirting, romantic, filial and bitterness.

It was indeed a very special pre-Valentine's Day Show by Cebu's homegrown Our House last February 11, held at A SPACE Cebu at Crossroads, Banilad, Cebu City.

Together with my friends Evan James owner of Desargves blog and who also helped me with this review, and our other friend, LJ, we enjoyed the last full performance of the show.

Comfortably Seated waiting for the show!

Beautiful Tickets!

What made the show more interesting is that the 7 pm time slot got a surprise bonus composition by Josh Eballe who shared his piece on HOT APE: The Science of Flirting. This piece is very dear to him as this is his thesis research for his Masters in Psychology. It was a performance slash Flirting 101 Class slash 50 Shades of Cebu! HOT APE is short for the 6 Behaviors of Flirting - Humor, Open Body Language, Touch, Attention, Proximity, and Eye Contact and we were a lucky bunch to learn about it!

As I have said, the HOT APE  was a bonus and a very special one. Followed by the great 8 other masterpieces and here goes.

Josh Eballe; man of many talents!

AKIN KA NALANG, PLEASE? written by Mark Ghosn and performed by Clint Solante is a story about a guy and his girl best friend and his love for her, but there's one problem; The girl is in love with someone else. It was a monologue of his feelings towards the girl and how he's the better man for her versus the other guy. What made the story interesting is how it was delivered with subtle adlibs, Clint's charm and of course, as premier actors of Our House, they delievered it as if they are the characters of the monologue.

"Mas madami pa syang date kesa sa kalendaryo!"

LISOD KARIBAL SI PAPA JESUS written by Abyy Orbeta, translated to Cebuano and performed by Ansel Ancajas is a story about a girl's longing for his longtime crush from her college years until they graduated and years after, she still wasn't over with him. Until one day, one trip to Baguio, they met and didn't expect to see him on the same bus and their journey to Baguio led her to the news that he will be soon joining the seminary. and it was indeed she knew then, that her rival will be Jesus with the love of her life and it was indeed hard to be a rival of Jesus.

 

Everyone loved Ansel's performance here!

"Nag pray nako sa ampuan para machange lang iyang mind! 

Nag ampo nako sa langit, sa lupa, kay Buddha, kay Allah! 

kay Je... ay karibal baya ko ni Jesus.. 

sa mga angels.. ay close man sila ni Jesus... 

basta nag ampo ako sa mga dili close ni Jesus!"

DILI PWEDE NGA DILI NA written by Mark Ghosn, translated to Cebuano by Josh Eballe and performed by Nash Durano who gave a very startling entrance! His facial expression sang Jennifer Hudson's "And I Am Telling You I’m Not Going" without opening his mouth, which brought to the monologue of his confrontation with his partner that's breaking up with him even if they've been together for a very long time. He even changed himself for the guy who wants him to be the discreet manly gay guy. The lines and delivery of Nash may come out as comedy, but this is one of the realities that most LGBT sadly faces. The twist at the end of him not letting his lover break up with him and stepping his foot down proved that if you really love someone, you really have to fight for it; in one way or another.

"So no, you're stuck with me because I'm not accepting your break up. 

You have to give me a more valid reason than that. Now, dinner is ready."

DALAWANG KURAP, written by Mark Ghosn and performed by Rachel Laya-og is my favorite both in monologue and Rachel being a performer as well. This was already proven with her history of monologues and performances before. Her monologue is a story about her confrontation about her boss' break up with his relationship, however, what seems to be a conversation of trying to know the story, ended up of his confession of his feelings for her that he really loves her.

Rachel Laya-og always gives her best!

"at ikatlo, magpaalam ka muna kina mama at papa ha. 

Kasi baka magulat nalang sila pupunta ka bukas ng alas-10 ng gabi 

tapos may dala kang isang box ngFerrero nakakagulat kaya...

kung ayaw mo eh di dalawa."

KILALA NA KITA written by Denise Danielle and performed by OurHouse cast and this was one of the masterpieces of their performance. They performed it in such a way that the last few lines of the first person will be continued by the second cast and so on and so forth. It was a simple performance that I got lost in their performance and mesmerized by the monologue as well. This is a monologue about someone's love for a special someone and how that person knows everything about that special someone from their first heartbeat, to their heartbreak,  and letting that special someone the very special kind of love.

"Nung unang beses na tumibok ang puso mo, kilala na kita."

PINAKA MAHIRAP PATAWARIN ANG SARILI

Love for One’s Self—acknowledging the inevitability to err but never living in the definition of the mistakes.

Nothing is more courageous than knowing and acknowledging your flaws and making it an asset to improve. It may be inevitable, as humans, to err but it should not be a part of us as a definition. Cliché as it may sound, but loving one’s self may be the greatest gift one can give to his or herself. Oftentimes, we discredit the beauty of our deeds. We tend to downplay the experiences that ought to be lauded and instead we hide in the stains of our mistakes, like as if it has become our psyche. We live in the imperfections of our deed—feeding our insecurities and lack of self-worth. We look too closely at it that we forget to look at the bigger picture. We are too engulfed in the stain that we miss out the rest of the details that makes the picture a wonderful experience. Indeed even though how bad our actions may be at times, there will always be beauty in it. That it will always impart a lesson that should be cherished, and not regrets.

Pinakamahirap Patawarin ang Sarili written by Rod Mamol, performed by Troy Tomarong circles around the theme of self-worth and self-love. In his portrayal, he highlighted his imperfections: the time when he cooked rice but turned it into porridge, the time when he got a failing mark in Geometry when he was late in his first day of work. The story, however, ended with a consolation of his mistakes. He looked at the brighter side of it: that instead of looking at the semi-porridge rice they must instead be happy that there is food, the lessons learned in every mistake.

Troy’s portrayal was effective and his funny tricks also made it through. He balanced the heaviness of the theme with his quirky self. It is very commendable especially when you have to juggle from being serious to throwing antics every once in a while. However, it was not all smooth. There were times when he stutters or he forgets his line but it wasn’t that obvious. Overall, Troy’s portrayal of the story was splendidly done. -Desargves

KUNG ALAM KO LANG

Love for a family—the certainty of goodbyes in a lifetime.

Memories last long. People come and go but memories are there to stay, even in the absence of the person the memory is attached. Memories aren’t easily voided. When someone dear departs, we cry and the solace is brought about by the memories—the happiness, the hardships, the very essence of the person. Memories give comfort. It gives a consolation beyond the comfort of physical touch.

Memories swarm like that of stars. They twinkle but they never fool your sight. And every night, when the need arises, you just need to look up and watch the memories twinkle, as they fill your heart and sight with happiness and nostalgia.

Kung Alam Ko Lang, written by Brian Vee and performed by Everlid Catugal revolves around the story of a son storytelling that tragic night his mother befell at the hands of death. The main character, as portrayed, drowned in the thoughts of regrets as he failed to accompany his mom on the night of her demise.

He introduced with a concept in science—Albert Einstein’s Theory of Relativity. The act used the imagery of stars as a symbolism of the memory of the mother. The act was presented in Filipino (Tagalog) which I think would have been more effective if it were delivered in English or Cebuano since Cebuano/Bisaya are more efficient in those two languages. The theme was heavy, which required the actor, Everlid, to cry but he wasn’t that effective in portraying his tears. More so, I feel that he was conflicted with his lines and his act that none of it were efficiently delivered. Everlid is somehow detached with the nature of his character that portraying him tasted unnatural.  Anyhow, he was still able to deliver the message he has to impart. -Desargves



MAAYONG ADLAW, LANGGA! KUMUSTA NA MAN KA DIHA?

Love that lasts a Lifetime—’til death do us part: of a love that was and a love that will last.

Enjoy everything while they last because once they’re lost they’re lost for a lifetime, they say. But never true love. Love, like energy, can never lose its essence. Instead, it lasts longer than a lifetime. The memorabilia, the testimonies—these are what makes it last. An act of love, no matter how small, never fades into the nothingness but instead is celebrated.  A love that was is the same love as it lasts. Most times, it is never jaded by adversities instead it is strengthened.

THE Mr. Nicholas Ampatin!

Maayong Adlaw, Langga! Kumusta Na Man Ka Diha? written by Zuella Herrera, translated to Cebuano by Josh Eballe, performed by Nicholas Ampatin is a sad story of a long time couple separated by death. It is also rather a hopeful realization of the fervent love that was and still is. The whole ride was a reminiscence of the acts of love from the dearly departed wife to his husband.

Theatre certainly knows no age and Nicholas Ampatin is undeniably aging well. Nicholas Ampatin portrayed the character well. The act was presented in Bisaya so the language isn’t a barrier to effectively convey what there is to convey. Although the crying scene wasn’t as effective as it should be, it still brought a slight twitch in me. The script was somehow repetitive and the images were redundant. The act may have been prolonged with more lines, more experience. Overall, Nicholas brought the character to life very well. -Desargves

-*-

It was rather interesting that the first few monologues were performed in Filipino ( aka Tagalog) which actually made my friends wonder because most of the performance they did before was in Bisaya. It was when some of the pieces where performed in Bisaya that made them at ease, not knowing that this is actually a challenge for them and made me appreciate them more in terms of translating into Bisaya and the performers speaking in Filipino (aka Tagalog), because we know, there are people who are challenged to speak in that language.

Overall, I give a 9/10 rating for this show.

When Josh shared his piece HOT APE: The Science of Flirting, I didn't know that, one, it was part of the show, two, it was a last minute composition that he did for the show which really made it even more special. How many performances/plays/shows have you watched last minute compositions like this!

The performers did a great job in portraying their characters. It was as if they were the characters in the monologue they performed and were speaking to us.

It was also a rather humbling experience when Josh shared with everyone his awards from the recent Sinulog Short Film Competition. He wasn't able to attend the Awarding Ceremony due to the show. From their previous performance Pit Senyor kay Merci Kini, they turned it into a film that made him the 2nd Best Picture, Best Supporting Actor, and Best Screenplay/Story as well. The Best Supporting Actor, Mr. Nicolas Ampatin wasn't aware that he won the award since they just announced it during the show and emotions really filled the air.


There were just a few minor technical slips during the surprise, last-minute performance for HOT APE, some minor lighting, and a few lines that didn't sync, however, these were just dust in the wind in terms of the overall performance, because that, the message and their hard work are more important.



Beyond the act, the monologues, the simplicity, and sincerity of their performance, the emotions, the tears, the audience's laughter, the words, the lights, the darkness, the warm embrace, the awards. They continue to deliver the best pieces, monologues, and performance. From someone who has a background in theatre, they just didn't do monologues but made sure that these performances were made special- the translation to Cebuano, the very intricate performance KILALA NA KITA, and I would definitely would like to shout out to Mr. Nicolas Ampatin - I've never known someone who at his time, still has the passion and energy to do theatre plays.


To Our house, our sincerest and deepest thank you for giving Cebuanos the chance to enjoy the life of an audience watching theatre plays at a very reasonable price, yet delivers extravagantly.  - Mark aka Vondraye

Taking their final bow

Overall, the experience I had in the play was more than splendid. With the various acts, it will bring you to the many dimensions there is in love. The atmosphere was also engaging. The spectators followed the house rules which made the experience even grander. The acts from two ladies and Nash were superb. They were really in character. Their humor was never bland. Very natural. A little discomfort though for their comfort room since it’s slightly far from the venue but what gives? The comfort room is of littlest concern since the play is the highlight (hahaha). There were also a minute technicality problems, yet they didn’t hinder the actors from portraying their characters. - Evan James aka  Desargves

You can visit their Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/ourhousecebu/ to get updates on their next performances and get to know the performers as well!